The ocean can be scary and liberating at the same time

“Knowledge of Self is Powerful.”

This year, I have been on an intentional journey of becoming fearless and being more vulnerable.  It’s not as scary as it sounds (anymore).  It’s a courageous journey.  I am not always successful, but I talk back to my fears as often as I can and start moving again.

Dr. Brene Brown is a social worker and researcher who has spent the last two decades studying vulnerability.  She defines vulnerability as “uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure.”  In talking of her journey to becoming more vulnerable, she states, “My inability to lean into the discomfort of vulnerability limited the fullness of those important experiences that are wrought with uncertainty: Love, belonging, trust, joy, and creativity to name a few. Learning how to be vulnerable has been a street fight for me, but it’s been worth it.”

I have read several of Dr. Brown’s books, with my favorites being: Daring Greatly and The Gifts of Imperfection.  Her Houston talk, The Power of Vulnerability, is one of the top ten most viewed TED talks in the world.

What Vulnerability Means to Me

For me, being vulnerable means accepting that I am imperfect and acknowledging that perfection does not exist.  Looking in the mirror at my naked body and not seeing what I would like to see, but smiling and loving me, is as good as it gets.  The person I see with the “perfect body” might be a hot mess who hates what she sees in the mirror.

But being vulnerable goes beyond the physical mirror to looking into a spiritual mirror.  It’s about not being ashamed of who I am, where I am from, or how often I have failed.

It means admitting when I am wrong, asking for forgiveness, being quick to forgive, and being humble enough to ask for help.  It’s shedding layers of insecurities and cleaning out my clothes where I hoard things “just in case.”

It also means limiting my interaction with toxic people (because you really can’t get rid of some family members), speaking up instead of shutting up, and throwing the heavy, unnecessary things out of my boat so that I can sail fearlessly with the wind at my back.

Becoming Vulnerable

Being a part of the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation Culture of Health Leaders (Cohort 2) has also played a large part in becoming more vulnerable and being authentically Dee!  I have learned a lot about my strengths, weaknesses, how to talk myself down off the ledge, how to play and work (well) with others, and how to bring out the best in my peers.  The program has provided a sacred space to grow, learn, and heal.  I can honestly say that my cohort and coach love me unconditionally and I love them unconditionally too.  We are being vulnerable and courageous together as we aim to increase health equity and create a Culture of Health in America!

Reflect

  1. What is the hardest part of being vulnerable? Why is that?
  2. What do you think of the idea that when we become vulnerable that it increases our capacity for love, joy, and creativity?
  3. Watch The Power of Vulnerability and see how you can take some steps to becoming more vulnerable.

Please share your experience in the comment section of this blog. Or you can join the conversation on the Keep It Tight Sisters Facebook Group.

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