A women’s circle is a gathering organized for women by women. Indeed, the circle is a powerful and meaningful way for women to connect, heal, and grow. Additionally, these circles provide a safe space for women to tap into their feminine energy, explore their passions, share ideas, and collectively create change.
There is a resurgence of women’s circles in self-care, wellness, and yoga communities. We know that women have a natural ability to help and empower each other. However, many have never intentionally been a part of a women’s circle.
So, what exactly is a women’s circle? Well, read on to learn about women’s circles, questions to ask before joining a circle, and how to host your own circle in person or online. Undeniably, these gatherings will improve physical, mental, and spiritual life.
Table of contents
- What Is a Women’s Circle?
- Women’s Circle Ceremonies and Rituals
- 16 Benefits of Joining a Women’s Circle
- How to Find a Women’s Circle
- 17 Questions to Ask Before Joining a Women’s Circle
- Consider These 7 Questions Before Hosting a Women’s Circle
- Follow These 6 Steps to Host Your Own Women’s Circle at Home
- Follow These 9 Steps to Host a Women’s Circle Online
- Now, It’s Your Turn
What Is a Women’s Circle?
Something spiritual and joyful happens when women intentionally gather. Women have been coming together in circles since the beginning of time. Indeed, it is a primal urge to gather and connect with other women.
These gatherings are sometimes referred to as red tents or moon lodges. Historically, women gathered during a new moon or full moon to celebrate the divine feminine. They recognized the connection between menstrual cycles and lunar cycles. Indeed, rather than being a curse, menstruation represents death and rebirth.
During these ancient gatherings, women of all ages circled the light and warmth of a fire. It was a time to share meals, tell stories, learn healing traditions, celebrate life events, and honor the ancestors.
Read It’s Our Time: A Call-and-Response Journal of Women’s Voices.
Women’s Circles Today
Today’s women’s circles seek to carry on this sacred tradition of our female ancestors. We often get so caught up in our busy lives that we forget to take the time to connect meaningfully with other women.
Could this be one of the reasons why we feel overwhelmed and pulled in so many directions?
Women are caretakers of children and elders, gatekeepers to the home and community, and community leaders. However, we often neglect our physical, mental, and spiritual health. Indeed, many of us seldom go beyond basic self-care.
Modern gatherings seek to remember, revive, and reclaim the tradition of sharing collective knowledge and wisdom, healing, and building community. These safe spaces offer women a place to feel seen and heard. Indeed, our families and communities will heal when women in these circles heal.
Women’s Circle Ceremonies and Rituals
Women often gather to perform ceremonies, rituals, and rites of passage. Some ceremonies and rituals that take place in some circles include:
- Welcome to womanhood (first menses)
- Quinceanera blessings
- Bridal blessings
- Safe pregnancy blessings
- Baby blessings
- Welcome to motherhood blessings
- Welcome to grandmotherhood blessings
- Celebration of life, homegoings for the deceased
- Annual blessing of leaders (community, politicians, etc.)
- Annual blessings of officers and first responders
- Back to school blessings of teachers and professors
- Prayer breakfasts
- Cacao ceremony
16 Benefits of Joining a Women’s Circle
Sitting in a circle is one of the most obvious things about participating in a women’s gathering. Indeed, sitting in a circle promotes intimacy, equality, unity, and continuity. Luckily, there are no front and back rows in a circle. A women’s circle:
- Encourages sisterhood
- Builds lifelong friendship
- Strengthens community
- Provides a safe space for women’s voices
- Helps with conflict resolution
- Encourages self-reflection
- Boosts female empowerment
- Nurtures self-care and healing
- Discusses needs in the community
- Teaches new skills
- Discusses important topics
- Develops professional connections
- Celebrates life events
- Celebrates the divine feminine
- Performs blessings, rituals, and rites of passage ceremonies
- Honors our female ancestors
How to Find a Women’s Circle
It is not surprising that there is a resurgence of women’s circles. There are gatherings in living rooms, backyards, yoga studios, yurts, and women’s retreats and festivals worldwide. Many circles honor the tradition of gathering monthly at the new moon.
Now, you don’t want to miss this. Many local gatherings and events are not named “women’s circles.” Thus, this requires you to look a little deeper to find one. One of my friends asked around on social media and found a few in her area.
These gatherings have names such as:
- Moon lodges
- Red tent circle
- Women’s healing circle
- Women’s ministry circle
- Goddess Circle
- Sacred women’s circle
- Sacred gathering of women
- New moon circle
- Full moon circle
Another option is to look in the Red Tent Directory for a list of official red tent gatherings and women’s circles worldwide. According to their website, regardless of the type of gathering:
- Women meet regularly and do so at an agreed time and place.
- Each woman has time and space to speak without debate or discussion.
- The donation amount at free or donation-based events is at the donor’s discretion.
17 Questions to Ask Before Joining a Women’s Circle
Before attending or joining a women’s circle, it is important to ask these questions:
- What is the purpose of the gathering?
- Where is it held?
- How long does the gathering last?
- How often does it meet?
- Is it open to women of all ages, races, and ethnic groups?
- Does this align with my spiritual or religious beliefs?
- Will it enhance or deepen my cultural traditions?
- Is alcohol served?
- Are there elements of the occult or witchcraft incorporated?
- Is a fee or donation required?
- Does it follow an agenda or specific format?
- What types of activities do they do?
- Do I have to share during the circle?
- How big is the gathering?
- Can I bring a friend?
- How do I prepare for the gathering?
- Do I need to bring something?
Trust your gut if you are uncomfortable with most of the answers. However, being open-minded and getting out of our comfort zones is also important. So, try attending a few. If they still make you uncomfortable, then consider starting your own gathering.
Read 9 Empowering Quotes by Black Women on Being Fearless
Consider These 7 Questions Before Hosting a Women’s Circle
Increasingly, more women are hosting invitation-only, private gatherings at their homes. Starting a women’s circle can be as simple as inviting close friends and family members. Depending on the desired size and purpose, the group can also expand to neighbors and sisters in the church or community.
The most important element is that the circle is an all-female gathering—by women for women. Here are seven questions to consider before hosting a women’s circle.
1. What Is the Purpose of the Circle?
Spend some time thinking about why you want to start a women’s circle. Participating in different women’s circles often lets you know what you like or don’t like. Initially, your circle might be about connecting and sharing with other women. Or it might be to deepen cultural roots or to create or revive blessing and rites of passage ceremonies.
If starting a circle weighs heavy on your heart, pray about it and encourage a few friends to do so. Creating a vision board and journaling will also clarify your purpose.
2. Who Do You Want to Join Your Circle?
On the surface, this appears to be an easy question, but it is not. Interestingly, making friends and meaningful connections gets harder as we get older. Most red tent circles and moon lodges are open to women of all backgrounds, ages, and ethnicity. However, many women choose to have private and invitation-only circles for a specific purpose. No judgment here.
Many want to:
- Deepen cultural roots
- Revive cultural traditions
- Develop spiritual connections with women of the same faith
- Deepen relationships with extended family members
By the way, your best friend, sister, or auntie may not be a good fit for your women’s circle. Hmm. Let’s get real and speak the truth. And guess what? They may not want to join anyway.
Ultimately, a women’s circle provides a safe place to belong without judgment.
3. What Activities Do You Want to Do?
There is no set format for a women’s circle. In fact, the only requirement is that it is a gathering for women by women. Additionally, women sit in a circle at some point in the gathering.
Thus, circle formats vary widely by content and structure. Some have a structured agenda, with time allotted for various activities.
Others are loosely organized as sharing circles. Many start with an open or theme-based sharing time. An open-sharing format can be as simple as asking, “What does freedom mean to you?” On the other hand, the host or facilitator decides on a theme.
Regardless of the type of sharing, women speak without interruption, discussion, or debate.
After sharing time, more structured circles have activities such as:
- Praying
- Mediating
- Doing yoga
- Deep breathing exercises
- Journal writing
- Performing blessings
- Singing
- Chanting
- Drumming
- Dancing
- Preparing and sharing food
- Performing a Cacao Ceremony
Here’s a brief discussion in case you’re wondering about a Cacao Ceremony. Notably, it is a staple in many women’s circles. It can be a stand-alone event or done at the end of the gathering. Modern cacao ceremonies originate from the Mayan and Ancient civilizations. Indeed, these civilizations used cacao in many areas of their daily lives. A trained individual should do Cacao Ceremonies. Things to know before doing your first Cacao Ceremony are here.
According to Oracaca.com, “Cacao ceremonies are helpful for getting clarity, setting intentions, and doing healing work, and inner processing.”
Notably, cacao is a superfood with many health benefits. Brands we like:
- Volupta Organic & Fair-Trade Unsweetened Cacao Powder
- Terrasoul Superfoods Cacao Powder
- Vivanaturals Organic Cacao Nibs
4. Who Will Facilitate the Meeting?
A women’s circle is all about building sisterhood and creating a tribe. Now, you don’t want to miss this. Hosting the circle does not necessarily mean that you must also facilitate it. Work within your gifts and talents.
If you are good at planning and organizing, use your leadership gift to build sisterhood and a community of warrior women. I recommend collaborating with a small team to plan the gatherings and brainstorm for facilitators for a particular gathering.
Qualities of an excellent group facilitator:
- Is authentic
- Has effective communication skills
- Is a keen observer
- Maintains a positive environment
- Promotes constructive feedback
- Exhibits patience
5. Where Will You Hold The Gathering?
There are limitless options on where to hold your women’s circle. Unbelievably, the pandemic moved some gatherings online, and many are still thriving. Here are some ideas on where to hold a women’s circle.
- Living rooms
- Backyards, lanais, porches
- Yoga studios
- Barns
- Beaches
- Parks
- Forrest
- Retreat centers
- Hotel conference rooms
- Houses of worship
- Community centers
- Online
6. When and How Often Will You Hold It?
Decide if you will meet weekly, monthly, quarterly, etc. Indeed, building community and sisterhood takes time, so meet regularly.
Many women’s circles meet during a new moon. So, why is that? Well, for many, the new moon symbolizes new beginnings. It is also a time for reflecting, declaring intentions, and planting seeds of hope.
7. How Long Will The Gathering Last?
Women have busy lives, and time is always an issue. One hour will be enough for a small group sharing and connection session. However, blessing, healing, and rites of passage ceremonies require more time.
Follow These 6 Steps to Host Your Own Women’s Circle at Home
Many women choose to host a private women’s circle in their homes. Don’t sweat the details too much or try to have the “perfect” gathering the first time. Notably, the size of your home determines the number of women whom you invite. Indeed, after meeting a few times, you will know the best size for the group and what works and what doesn’t. Here are some ideas to get started.
1. Create a Comfortable Seating Space
Start by creating a comfortable space for sitting in a circle. While cushions and pillows are lovely touches, most women cannot sit on the floor for too long.
2. Decorate Your Space
Decorating your space can be simple as using candles, fresh flowers, potpourris, incense, a Himalayan salt lamp, or an aromatherapy diffuser.
Essential oils for the diffuser or cleansing herbs to burn for outdoor gatherings include:
- Sage essential oil or sage herb bundles (purification)
- Rosemary essential oil or dried rosemary leaves (new beginnings)
- Yerba santa herb bundles (healing)
- Cedar essential oil or cedar chips sachets (declutter)
- Mugwort dried leaves (dreamy)
- Juniper berry essential oil or dried juniper berries (comfort)
- Frankincense essential oil or frankincense resin (purification)
- Myrrh essential oil or myrrh resin (purification)
- Sandalwood essential oil or dried sandalwood chips (grounding)
Pay special attention to what you place in the center of the circle. Your centerpiece may change depending on your theme. Ideas include:
- Fresh flowers
- Candles
- Artwork
- Stones
- Bowl (wooden, crystal, etc.)
- Books
- Photographs
Some circles create an altar for their centerpiece. Consider delegating the centerpiece to different women for each meeting. This creates a feeling of being part of the creative process.
3. Set the Tone with Music
Background music adds an important element to the space. Consider playing:
- Instrumental
- Nature sounds
- Chanting
- Singing bowls
- Etc.
Consider delegating the music to different women for each meeting. This creates a feeling of being part of the creative process.
4. Create Guidelines for the Circle
It’s important to have guidelines for your women’s circle. A fundamental rule is that everyone gets heard. Therefore, consider adopting or modifying a few basic small-group guidelines:
- Start on time and finish on time.
- Mandate confidentiality (i.e., what is said in the group stays in the group).
- Establish the length of the sharing time (e.g., 2-3 minutes or 3-5 minutes).
- Use “I” statements (e.g., I feel, I believe, etc.).
- Do not interrupt, debate, clarify, or add to someone’s statement.
- Be silent when someone speaks (i.e., no cross-talk).
5. Open the Circle
Opening the circle shifts the space from a social time to a sacred gathering.
- Sit in a circle.
- Welcome the women and thank them for attending.
- Open the circle by ringing a small bell or chime.
- Focus the group’s attention with prayer, meditation, poems, breathwork, or songs.
- Review the circle guidelines.
- Open sharing time.
- Transition to other activities (singing, dancing, drumming, blessings, rituals, ceremonies, discussing a topic, reading poetry, preparing food, learning a new skill, etc.)
6. Close the Circle
Closing the circle shifts the space from a sacred gathering back to a social time.
- Sit in a circle.
- Thank everyone for coming.
- Do a closing prayer, song, or meditation.
- Ring a small bell or chime to close the circle.
- Serve refreshments or a meal (optional)
- Stay in touch.
Follow These 9 Steps to Host a Women’s Circle Online
The COVID-19 pandemic pushed many women’s circles online. Indeed, online women’s circles are growing and thriving online. I am not surprised to hear this because I attended several funerals, family reunions, weddings, and baby showers online. Undeniably, hosting an online women’s circle is ideal for connecting to or creating a global tribe.
1. Choose Your Video Conferencing Platform
One of the most important decisions is to choose your video conference platform. Many platforms have paid and free versions. However, the free versions often have a time limit for the sessions. All participants need to sign up for an account.
Popular options include:
Regardless of the platform, remind all participants about video conferencing etiquette.
2. Send a Reminder and Agenda
Send an email or text the meeting invitation to all participants a week before the event. Most importantly, ask them to respond to the invitation (yes, no, or maybe) as soon as possible. If you have your agenda ready, then ask for volunteers. Send a reminder and an agenda (optional) the day before the gathering.
3. Ask Participants to Set the Mood
It’s important for participants to put some effort into creating an inviting space and setting the mood in their homes. Encourage women to set the mood in their homes by lighting candles or incense, playing soft background music, or running an aromatherapy diffuser.
4. Stay in Video Mode
A women’s circle requires everyone to be present and in the moment. Thus, all participants should be on video. Indeed, video meetings encourage bonding and allow participants to observe body language. However, poor internet and video quality mean some may have to use audio only.
5. Disable the Chat (Please!)
Let’s be honest. Chatting in the comment box when someone is speaking is rude. It’s the same as cross-talking and interrupting. If someone has difficulty connecting, they should text the host. I recommend allowing five or so minutes for a meet and greet and then disabling the chat.
6. Mute Unless Speaking
It is important to mute everyone at the start of the gathering. When the gathering begins, invite women to unmute themselves when it is their turn to speak. Remind them to mute themselves when they finish talking. For sharing time, decide if you will call each woman by name or ask them to use the raise hand feature.
7. Manage Time
Whether the meeting is in person or online, it is important to start and finish on time. This is important to remember with sharing time and having a large number at the gathering. Delegate someone to be the timekeeper. The sound of the bell or chime signals the speaker to wrap it up.
8. Leave Unstructured Time at the End
It is important to leave some time when the gathering is over for the women to chat, giggle, get caught up, and say goodbye.
9. Stay in Touch
It is tough out there, and life is too hard to do it alone. So, remind the women to stay in touch with each other.
Now, It’s Your Turn
After reading this article, I hope you feel excited about joining or starting a women’s circle. These gatherings allow women to connect with themselves and each other. Indeed, they offer a safe space for women to find support and create a community. Women’s circles can be created for any topic, but they are often created for healing, personal and professional development, celebration, and connection.
- Are you part of a women’s circle? If so, what is its focus?
- What would be its focus if you were to start a women’s circle?
I think you will enjoy the posts on Cheshire cat quotes to inspire women leaders, I AM affirmations to crush your goals, fierce quotes by Black women on being successful, and shadow work prompts to learn, heal, and grow.
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